Alain Guillot

Life, Leadership, and Money Matters

Assortative mating: Rich people are marrying rich people

assortative mating, rich people getting married

Whom would you marry?

If you are intelligent would you like to marry someone who is dumb?
No!

If you are fit, would you like to marry someone who is obese?
No!

If you are beautiful, would you like to marry someone ugly?
Probably no.

If you are rich, would you like to marry someone poor?
Most likely no.

Assortative Mating is Happening whether we like it or not

Assortative mating is happening whether we like it or not. Whether we think it’s fair or not. Humans tend to mate with their socio-economic peers, those who have similar incomes and education.

Rich and educated people tend to marry among themselves and poor and uneducated people tend to marry among themselves as well, thus perpetuating the socioeconomic differences.

In the case of rich people, if you happen to go to private schools, live in a gated community, go to expensive clubs, bars, or restaurants, fly fist class, go to private health care facilities, go to private gyms, and get specialized education, chances are that you will mingle with other people who have the same socioeconomic background. Many times it is not a conscious decision to marry other rich people, they just marry the kind of people they spend the most time with.

On the other hand, if you are poor and you go to public school, public health facilities, fly in economy class, go to less expensive restaurants or clubs, you will mingle with people who have more or less the same income level.

Assortative mating creates income inequality

These assortative mating tendencies have been cited as a source of economic inequality. When two highly educated people, with connections, and economic means get together, they become even more wealthy, better educated and their kids get even better education and resources. 

You don’t have to stay stuck in your socioeconomic pool

But you know what, economic inequality is always going to exist. But if you are poor with a lack of education, you can change your status.

Compare two poor people. After their job at the local retail store, one goes home, smokes a joint and starts watching TV. The other goes to night school to take some courses that will help him/her advance at his job. Will the two people stay at the same level after 10 years? Of course not. One will advance and become richer and the other one will not.

If you are born poor, you can shortcut the system. You can continue going to school, continuing upgrading your skills, or you can become an entrepreneur, and create a business that will surpass the socioeconomic level of your peers.

Rich people are generally rich because they work to stay rich. Sure, they have many privileges and they have a head start, but it’s not uncommon to see them working 10-hour days.

My own experience

I have always dated within my own socioeconomic group. I have always felt attracted to beautiful women, regardless of their wealth. Most of my relationship has started on a dance floor because I was a dance teacher for so many years.

However, I am trying to become more wealthy and thus, socialize with more wealthy people.

If you had a chance to have a relationship with someone wealthier, would you do it? I don’t know if I would. I would be too conscious of the power dynamics.

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